People who work in IT are a popular target when it comes to making fun of people in the workplace, but Paul Rudd and Beck Bennett’s IT characters on this cut Saturday Night Live sketch take it to a whole different level.
During the office’s retirement party for their boss David, the guys in IT put together a little something special. What everyone thought would be a nice slideshow turned out to be a new wave performance about their love of computers. With their silver suits, slicked hair, and keyboard/keytar instruments, the whole thing has a very heavy Kraftwerk/Talking Heads/Devo vibe.
It’s a truly bizarre performance with references to how computers are gods, computers will take over the world, and Bennett professing (in song) that he’d like to have sex with a computer. Almost everyone starts breaking character at that point.
Luckily, just as it was with DVDs and the internet, the sex industry is at the forefront of the evolution of gadget technology. And that means some ingenious tools for making masturbation fun again.
Leave it to Pornhub, the most popular adult entertainment site on the world wide web, to not only have its own toy line but to have a device with the great name “Blowbot.” This device for men can sync up with certain, compatible videos on the site to simulate the action you see on screen. And you can use the Feel Connect app to pair your Blowbot with a wide range of other toys for a mutual experience with a partner.
A simple, discreet app-based vibrator that lets you or a partner control the fun
Image: blueMotion
Speaking of remote play, the blueMotion NEX|1 vibrator allows for just that, letting whomever you connect to the app to control the settings for this small, silicone, Bluetooth-enabled vibrator. Whether that’s a partner or just yourself is up to you, but the size and shape of the device allow you to be discreet in your enjoyment.
The key to any good sex toy is versatility, and the iGasm Spinning Simulator accommodates certain self-pleasure needs for both men and women, depending on the fold-out attachment. It’s a simple tool with multiple uses even when you’re alone.
AI is the wave of the future and that applies to sex dolls, too. Take, for instance, the above doll, named Alison, which is said to include “responsive artificial intelligence, interactive voice communications, facial movement, body temperature control, and touch sensors.” That’s a pretty impressive list, which probably explains the steep price. But, for you, it may be worth it.
Like a lot of items on this list, this particular butt plug, advertised as “The World’s First Teledildonic Butt Plug,” allows remote access to the controls for yourself or a partner via an app. But there are other features that make it worth a look, like the option to sync to music or to activate via sounds. It also comes in two different sizes for your comfort.
The partner to the Blowbot, Pornhub’s Virtual Rabbit is a vibrator that has a lot of the same features, including video syncing and pairing via Feel Connect. Equipped for both clitoral and G-spot stimulation, the Virtual Rabbit has multiple functions and vibration patterns for all your self-pleasure needs.
Wrap your head around the guybrator. Or is it the other way around?
Image: OhMiBod
What’s a guybrator? A vibrator for men, of course. In case you can’t tell how it works from the photo, the Guybrator is a “revolutionary male stimulator that uses oscillation movement to stimulate a man.” It’s a brand new world for guys looking for something a little different.
Take your solo flights one step further with the Max (for him) and the Nora (for her), self-love toys that sync up with VR porn clips and enable you to really feel like you’re in the film. Compatible with Oculus Rift, Samsung Gear, and Google Cardboard, among other VR options, it’s not hard to, uh, get hard yourself.
OK, this one should be pretty self-explanatory. But this sex simulation tube has a few tricks in its skin sleeve to make it feel more realistic than most.
The Pom is a popular, flexible vibrator that’s also waterproof and has five different settings. The product comes from Dame, the toy company founded by Alexandra Fine and Janet Lieberman. Mashable chatted with Fine for a story on women in sex tech back in 2018, which you can check out here.
The Launchpad is here to solve an age-old problem.
Image: Fleshlight
This is for the prudent masturbator. Set up your iPad, insert penis, and thrust to completion. No fuss, no muss. Though it might take a bit of coordination so you can thrust and yet still see whatever video is playing on the iPad.
If you really want to take the mutual self-love thing one step beyond just an app, how about this vibrator that doubles as a camera? You can send video right to a partner’s phone, giving them the pleasure of watching you pleasure yourself. It even has an “intelligent mode” that “simulates vibration frequency during the whole process of sex from beginning to orgasm,” guaranteeing some fun regardless of whether or not you’ve got that camera on.
With NFL minicamps and OTAs in full swing, there is plenty of buzz surrounding incoming rookies to go around. Obviously, early draft picks like Kyler Murray and Quinnen Williams are expected to make an early impact, but first-round picks are not the only rookies worth being excited about.
In fact, some of the rookies who should excite fans weren’t even selected over draft weekend. Undrafted receiver Penny Hart, for example, could add an explosive element to the Indianapolis Colts offense that fans will be thrilled to see.
Here, we’ll examine each team’s 2019 undrafted free agent who, like Hart or 2018 undrafted Pro Bowler Phillip Lindsay, could both make the roster and provide a little sizzle as a rookie.
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Steve Conner/Associated Press
The Arizona Cardinals never really got a fair look at former first-round pick Josh Rosen because they never surrounded him with an adequate supporting cast. Now that Rosen is out and Oklahoma’s Kyler Murray is in at quarterback, the Cardinals must avoid making the same mistake.
Fortunately, Arizona has at least done a solid job of adding receiving talent to the roster. They drafted Andy Isabella, Hakeem Butler and KeeSean Johnson, while also adding former Boise State receiver A.J. Richardson after the draft.
Richardson is a 6’0″, 212-pound pass-catcher who pulled in 54 passes for 825 yards and eight touchdowns in 2018. He has the tools to bolster Arizona’s new-look receiving corps while also contributing as a gunner on special teams.
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Chuck Burton/Associated Press
The Atlanta Falcons aren’t exactly hurting for wide receivers. They have Julio Jones, obviously, plus Mohamed Sanu and 2018 first-round pick Calvin Ridley. However, this shouldn’t prevent fans from being excited about undrafted rookie receiver Olamide Zaccheaus.
Zaccheaus is a smaller receiver at 5’8″ and 188 pounds, but he’s fast, shifty and terrific after the catch. He could be the kind of slippery slot receiver the Falcons previously had in Taylor Gabriel.
In 2018, Zaccheaus racked up 1,058 yards and nine touchdowns. While he isn’t likely to see that kind of production in Atlanta as a rookie, he could add an additional burst to the Falcons passing attack. Look for him to make opposing defenses pay for giving too much attention to the established receivers on Atlanta’s roster.
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Michael Conroy/Associated Press
The Baltimore Ravens used two of their first three draft picks on wide receivers, grabbing Marquise Brown and Miles Boykin. Regardless, Ravens fans ought to be hyped for undrafted wideout Jaylen Smith.
See, Smith played his college ball at Louisville—you know, the same place where starting quarterback Lamar Jackson played his. The pair had some obvious chemistry while playing for the Cardinals. In 2017, Jackson’s final season, Smith caught 60 passes for 980 yards and seven touchdowns.
In addition to being a familiar face for Jackson, Smith has the physical tools to develop into a quality NFL wideout. At 6’2″, the 219-pounder racked up 550 yards in 2018, even without Jackson throwing him the ball.
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Joe Robbins/Getty Images
The Buffalo Bills already had a strong defense in 2018, as they allowed just 294.1 yards per game, second-fewest in the NFL. Any prospect who can potentially make that defense better should excite both the team and its fanbase.
This is exactly the kind of prospect Tyrel Dodson is. Despite regressing across most defensive categories in 2018, no one would have questioned the pick if the former Texas A&M standout had been drafted. Instead, the Bills were lucky to land him as a free agent after the draft.
Dodson possesses adequate size (6’0″, 237 lbs) and explosiveness for the position, plus an aggressive mentality. He should immediately contribute as a special teams player, but he has enough upside to crack the linebacker rotation as well.
In 2018, Dodson produced 70 tackles, seven tackles for loss and one interception (which he took to the house for a pick-six). Even though those aren’t realistic numbers for Dodson’s rookie season, they do suggest that he can be a tremendous depth player in Year 1.
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Darron Cummings/Associated Press
The Carolina Panthers have themselves a true workhorse back in Christian McCaffrey. While he can definitely do it all, it would be wise to reduce McCaffrey’s workload if the Panthers want to get the most out of him.
This is why the addition of bruising back Elijah Holyfield is exciting.
“He’s a fantastic power back who may need to work in tandem with a faster receiving option out of the backfield, but has the strength and vision to be an impactful rookie,” Bleacher Report draft analyst Matt Miller wrote of Holyfield.
If Holyfield sticks on the roster, he’ll be able to spell McCaffrey in short-yardage situations and on running downs, keeping the former first-rounder fresh and ready to generate explosive plays.
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Nam Y. Huh/Associated Press
The Chicago Bears aren’t particularly thin at wide receiver, but former Missouri wideout Emanuel Hall should still have a good shot at making the roster and contributing as a rookie. He’s just too talented not to.
At 6’2″ and 201 pounds, Hall has more than adequate size for the position. He has above-average speed too, having run a 4.39-second 40 at the combine. These skills allowed him to rack up 828 yards and six touchdowns on just 37 receptions in 2018 and should engender a role in the Bears offense.
Early on, Hall should contribute as a field-stretching complementary receiver, but he could potentially push a veteran like Allen Robinson or Taylor Gabriel off the roster within a year or two if he’s able to adapt to the speed and physicality of the NFL.
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Gary Landers/Associated Press
The Cincinnati Bengals are a bit of an afterthought in the AFC North right now. However, if new head coach Zac Taylor is able to get the most out of his offense, they could be a dangerous foe to reckon with.
The Bengals have weapons, including A.J. Green, Joe Mixon and Tyler Boyd. Undrafted wideout Stanley Morgan is another player who could hurt opposing defenses in 2019. The Nebraska product has good size (6’0″, 202 lbs) for the position and is more than willing to make tough catches.
In 2018, Morgan caught 70 passes for 1,004 yards and seven touchdowns. He’ll likely be a possession guy at the NFL level, but if he can provide Andy Dalton with a security blanket underneath, it would be a huge addition to Taylor’s offense.
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Ron Schwane/Associated Press
The Cleveland Browns grabbed cornerback Greedy Williams in the second round of the draft and will likely pair him with Denzel Ward on the outside. There is certainly room for depth at the position, though, which is why the addition of Jhavonte Dean is big.
Dean is a rangy corner (6’2″) with good ball skills (three picks in 2018) and a willingness to mix things up physically. He was granted a tryout with the Browns and quickly caught the team’s attention.
“He was a factor,” head coach Freddie Kitchens said, per Daryl Ruiter of 92.3 The Fan. “Anytime you are a factor, you kind of stand out. That is a good thing during this time of the year.”
Though Dean will likely begin his career as a special-teamer and a backup, he has the makeup of another young piece for Cleveland’s seemingly bright future.
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Darron Cummings/Associated Press
The strength of the Dallas Cowboys defense is its defensive line. Undrafted interior defender Daniel Wise has the potential to make that line even better as a rotational player. The Kansas product is a stout 6’3″ and 281 pounds and possesses enough attacking ability to disrupt pass plays from the middle.
“He is a busy-body pass rusher with the ability to find the edge early and then create his rush counters with footwork and agility,” NFL.com’s Lance Zierlein wrote of Wise.
While Wise is not a pure pass-rusher, he is versatile, just like his brother, New England Patriot Deatrich Wise. In 2018, he produced 34 total tackles, 12 tackles for a loss and five sacks. At the very least, he should stick to the roster as a backup.
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Steven Cannon/Associated Press
The Denver Broncos did a lot of work to address their quarterback position this offseason. They added Joe Flacco to be the quarterback of the present and drafted Missouri’s Drew Lock to potentially be the quarterback of the future.
Undrafted receiver Kelvin McKnight has enough ability and upside to benefit both signal-callers. The Samford product is a bit undersized at 5’8″ and 185 pounds, but his crisp route-running and ability to create space could allow him to be a threat out of the slot.
In 2018, McKnight produced 100 receptions and 1,453 receiving yards—impressive numbers for a receiver of any size. McKnight also spent four years as a returner, which should allow him to contribute on special teams from Day 1.
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Michael Conroy/Associated Press
Fans don’t usually get excited about undrafted interior offensive lineman. However, former Wisconsin guard Beau Benzschawel should at least grab some attention leading into the 2019 season. He’s a gargantuan 6’6″, 309-pound prospect who drew the interest of several NFL franchises.
In fact, Benzschawel had offers from “more than 20” teams, according to NFL Media’s Ian Rapoport.
Benzschawel is, at the very least, a Day-1 backup with developmental upside. However, if he adjusts to the speed and physicality of the pro game quickly, he may even force his way into the starting lineup before the end of his rookie campaign.
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Rick Scuteri/Associated Press
The Green Bay Packers took steps to improve their defense in regular free agency, adding Za’Darius Smith, Preston Smith and Adrian Amos. In undrafted free agency, they added former Baylor defensive end Greg Roberts.
Roberts has the size (6’5″, 258 lbs) and athleticism to be an exciting addition in his own right.
While a bit of a developmental prospect, Roberts’ combination of defensive-end strength and linebacker mobility makes him intriguing. He has some pass-rushing potential—3.0 sacks in 2018—but Roberts will likely begin his career as a backup and possibly a rotational defensive end on running downs.
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Michael Conroy/Associated Press
In 2019, the Houston Texans should focus on protecting quarterback Deshaun Watson with a strong running game. Lamar Miller and D’Onta Foreman should see plenty of work, and undrafted running back Karan Higdon could be part of that equation.
Higdon is a stout (5’9″, 206 lbs), physical runner who produced 1,178 yards on 5.3 yards per carry in 2018.
“Higdon was the savior of the Michigan offense early in the season when the passing game couldn’t get going. He was productive and consistent, but a lack of physical traits are an issue when watching his tape,” Bleacher Report’s Matt Miller wrote.
While Higdon will likely begin his career as the No. 3 back on the depth chart, his hard running style and ability to handle a high volume could push him past Foreman quickly. He also has enough upside to potentially develop into Houston’s primary runner.
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Andres Leighton/Associated Press
New Indianapolis Colts receiver Penny Hart was mentioned at the top of this article, and for good reason. The Georgia State product is a quick and elusive pass-catcher who can add an explosive element to the Indianapolis offense from Day 1.
With speedy T.Y. Hilton and possession receiver Devin Funchess also on the field, Hart should be able to create plenty of mismatches in the passing game out of the slot.
He can also contribute heavily on special teams. He showed the ability to return both kickoffs and punts in college—averaging more than 19 yards and 17 yards per return, respectively, in 2018. If Hart doesn’t make the 53-man roster, it would be a complete shock.
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Gerry Broome/Associated Press
The Jacksonville Jaguars are counting on new quarterback Nick Foles to help them get back to playoff contention. However, a defensive resurgence is also needed if Jacksonville is going to be a legitimate threat in the AFC.
Former Duke linebacker Joe Giles-Harris has the potential to be part of that resurgence. He’s a high-motor, physical player with plenty of pro upside.
In 2018, Giles-Harris amassed 81 total tackles, 7.0 tackles for a loss and a sack.
“On tape, Giles-Harris makes up for his limitations with an above-average sense of play development and consistent downhill fills to shore up the run defense,” NFL Media’s Lance Zierlein wrote.
Expect Giles-Harris to make the regular-season roster and to make an impact as a special teamer and a rotational defender.
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Darron Cummings/Associated Press
Pass defense was the Kansas City Chiefs’ biggest weakness in 2018. The defense allowed an average of 273.4 yards passing per game, second-most in the NFL. This is precisely why former Clemson cornerback Mark Fields has the potential to make an immediate impact for Kansas City.
Fields is a 5’10”, 192-pound cornerback fresh off a championship run with the Tigers. Though he didn’t see extensive work for the Clemson defense in 2018, he flashed his ball skills by defending five passes in limited action (seven games).
These ball skills—combined with legitimate sub-4.4 speed (he ran a 4.37-second 40)—give Fields the upside needed to be a sub-package defensive back in Steve Spagnuolo’s defense. He should see some work in nickel and dime schemes as well as on special teams early in his career.
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Gerry Broome/Associated Press
Los Angeles Chargers tight end Hunter Henry is working his way back from a torn ACL. The Chargers should be careful with his workload in 2018, which is why providing depth at tight end will be important.
This is where former Duke tight end Daniel Helm comes in.
Helm projects primarily as a blocking tight end, but he does have enough receiving ability to at least keep defenses honest. In 2018, he caught 26 passes for 271 yards and two touchdowns. He had similar production in 2016 and 2017. This means that if Helm is on the field, opposing teams won’t be able to assume it’s a running play.
Even if Helm only gets on the field for a handful of plays each game, those are plays during which Henry will be able to rest. Just the prospect of a fresh and healthy Henry for the stretch run should be exciting to fans.
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Marcio Jose Sanchez/Associated Press
The Los Angeles Rams have not re-signed defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh. While former Cincinnati defensive tackle Marquise Copeland isn’t going to replace Suh, he has the potential to at least limit the drop-off on the line.
The 6’2″, 287-pounder is versatile and has experience on the interior and at end. In 2018, he racked up 50 tackles, 7.5 tackles for loss and four sacks.
Copeland’s versatility should help defensive coordinator Wade Phillips with his schematic creativity up front. His ability to penetrate the backfield meshes with Phillips’ desire to create pressure from the interior. Copeland should fit into the line rotation as a rookie and could start in the future.
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David Zalubowski/Associated Press
The Miami Dolphins decided to take a chance on former Colorado State wide receiver Preston Williams, who was charged with domestic violence, harassment and tampering following an arrest in September 2017, per Kelly Lyell of the Fort Collins Coloradoan. A police report stated Williams was accused of pushing and restraining a woman who called herself his girlfriend.
He was arrested again the next month after allegedly violating a protection order by calling the woman “approximately 200” times. Williams pleaded guilty to harassment, with all other charges dropped. He was given a deferred sentence.
Williams isn’t the first and won’t be the last player a team takes a chance on despite character concerns, but from a football standpoint, the gamble makes sense.
The Dolphins don’t have many proven receivers on their roster. That is a problem because they will at least give 2018 first-round pick Josh Rosen a chance to show he can be a franchise quarterback. If Miami cannot field better weapons than the ones Rosen had in Arizona, the results aren’t likely to be much different.
Williams has the potential to be a difference-maker. He has tremendous 6’4″, 210-pound size, plus he’s shown he is capable of taking over games. Last season, he caught 96 passes for 1,345 yards and 14 touchdowns. He won’t record those numbers as a rookie, but he can be an early contributor.
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The Minnesota Vikings are set to lose second-year cornerback Holton Hill for the first month of the 2019 season because of a PED violation. Hill was an undrafted free agent last season and played extremely well when given the opportunity. He had 30 solo tackles and an interception.
While there’s no guarantee former Rutgers cornerback Isaiah Wharton will be this year’s version of Hill, the potential is there. He’s a stout 6’1″, 205-pounder who is willing to mix it up in the box. Last season, he produced 61 tackles, 5.5 tackles for loss and two interceptions.
Wharton is also durable, having started all 48 games of his college career.
At the very least, he should help the Vikings mitigate the loss of Hill for the first month of the season.
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The Patriots drafted former Arizona State wideout N’Keal Harry in the first round, and he’ll be the rookie receiver drawing attention in 2019. However, former North Carolina State receiver Jakobi Meyers should also get fans excited.
While Meyers doesn’t have blazing speed, he does have tremendous hands and a penchant for snagging contested balls. In 2018, he caught 92 passes for 1,047 yards and four touchdowns—impressive production considering receiver isn’t his original position.
Meyers is a converted quarterback, just like Patriots star Julian Edelman, who has made a living off of understanding Tom Brady’s tendencies. While the two are far different receivers, there is reason to believe that bringing a quarterback mentality to the position can be valuable in the New England system, which is so dependent on pre-snap adjustments.
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Joe Robbins/Getty Images
New Orleans Saints defensive end Carl Granderson played significant roles in all four of his collegiate seasons and racked up 11.5 sacks over the last two. He is also facing trial for sexual assault, however, which is likely the primary reason he wasn’t drafted. The Saints, however, seem to believe he will be cleared.
“We felt real comfortable with everything we knew, and so far he’s done a good job here,” head coach Sean Payton said, per Josh Katzenstein of NOLA.com.
Two women told police Granderson touched them sexually without consent in November, and third-degree sexual assault and sexual battery charges were issued three months later. Granderson pleaded not guilty, and the trial is set to begin July 15.
If Granderson is cleared and able to play, he has the potential to contribute right away as a situational pass-rusher, boosting a defense that already produced 49 sacks in 2018.
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Ralph Freso/Associated Press
The buzz surrounding the New York Giants draft has largely been focused on first-round quarterback Daniel Jones. However, quarterback isn’t the only position the Giants needed to address this offseason. They had to improve a defense that allowed 25.8 points per game in 2018.
That is why the signing of Texas-San Antonio’s Josiah Tauaefa was exciting. The 6’1″ 232-pound linebacker is aggressive and seemed to be involved in almost every play for the Roadrunners. In 2018, he amassed 111 tackles, 11.5 tackles for a loss and 4.5 sacks.
Tauaefa will likely begin his pro career as a depth player and special teamer, but he brings the kind of sideline-to-sideline coverage needed to get more playing time on defense as a rookie.
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Chuck Burton/Associated Press
The New York Jets may have finally found their franchise quarterback in the form of Sam Darnold. Now they need to focus on getting him the pieces needed to fully thrive. The addition of running back Le’Veon Bell will certainly help, but Darnold still needs more pass-catching weapons at his disposal.
This is where former Wake Forest wideout Greg Dortch comes into play.
Dortch is a shifty and quick receiver. He’s also reliable—particularly for his size (5’7″, 173 lbs)—having hauled in 89 balls for 1,078 yards and eight touchdowns in 2018. He has enough upside to secure a spot as a fifth or sixth receiver.
More immediately, though, Dortch should contribute on special teams. He averaged 11.0 yards per punt return and 20.9 yards per kick return for the Demon Deacons in 2018.
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Butch Dill/Associated Press
The Oakland Raiders got an up-close look at former UC Davis wideout Keelan Doss at this year’s Senior Bowl. Jon Gruden coached him with the North squad and saw firsthand the skills Doss deployed to dominate his competition in college.
In 2018, he produced 118 receptions, 1,334 yards and nine touchdowns. He did so with his size (6’2″, 211 lbs) and ability to sense soft spots in the coverage. These skills could help Doss become a solid possession receiver for the Raiders.
While fans are undoubtedly more excited about the arrival of offseason acquisition Antonio Brown, Doss could serve a noteworthy role in the Raiders offense for many years to come.
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Nam Y. Huh/Associated Press
The Philadelphia Eagles may have landed one of the steals of undrafted free agency in the form of former Wisconsin linebacker T.J. Edwards. The 6’1″, 242-pounder possesses a physical mindset that should mesh perfectly with the Eagles defense.
“Stout four-year starter who shows up and does his job each week as a banger in the box with surprising ball skills to flip the field,” NFL.com’s Lance Zierlein wrote of Edwards.
Edwards’ high motor regularly got him involved for the Badgers. In 2018, he racked up 112 tackles, including 11.5 tackles for loss and three sacks. While he isn’t likely to produce those kinds of numbers as a rookie, he should slot in as a backup inside linebacker who can start in a pinch.
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David Zalubowski/Associated Press
The Pittsburgh Steelers are still in the process of replacing Le’Veon Bell at running back. James Conner filled in well last season and looks to be a reliable starter when healthy. However, he did deal with injuries late in the year and with inconsistency early.
Depth behind Conner will be important, which is why the addition of Colorado’s Travon McMillian is exciting. He’s a versatile back capable of catching balls out of the backfield—he averaged 8.4 yards per reception in 2018—and returning kickoffs. He’s also motivated by what fellow undrafted Colorado product Phillip Lindsay accomplished in his Pro Bowl rookie season.
“I didn’t get invited to the combine, so I just used that as motivation and drive just like Phil did,” McMillian said, per Scott MacDonald of the CU Independent. “I’m just out here to prove myself.”
McMillian has the potential to contribute in the running game, the passing game and the return game as a rookie.
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Wilfredo Lee/Associated Press
San Francisco 49ers fans may not yet be familiar with former Florida Atlantic linebacker Azeez Al-Shaair. But the team’s pass-rushing coach, Chris Kiffin, definitely is.
Kiffin was the Owls’ defensive coordinator in 2017, a year in which Al-Shaair had 146 tackles and 10 tackles for loss.
Familiarity with an existing coach isn’t the only reason why Al-Shaair brings excitement, though. He has a solid 6’1″, 234-pound frame and is an aggressive and technically sound tackler who should contribute immediately on special teams. If Kiffin can get the most out of him, Al-Shaair may also become a regular presence on defense.
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Tim Warner/Getty Images
Former Baylor cornerback Derrek Thomas is not an NFL-ready prospect, but this is largely due to the fact that he is new to the position.
“With just three years as a full-time cornerback, it’s fair to assume he will continue to improve, but he needs plenty of work, and he must get tougher,” NFL.com’s Lance Zierlein wrote of Thomas.
The Seattle Seahawks should be excited about Thomas’ upside. He is a 6’3″, 189-pound pass defender with legitimate 4.4 speed. Those attributes are impossible to coach out of a player, and they’re perfectly suited for what the Seahawks like to have on the outside.
Thomas isn’t likely to see a ton of playing time as a rookie, but his development is going to provide plenty of excitement on its own.
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Joe Robbins/Getty Images
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers struggled to defend the pass in 2018—they allowed 259.4 yards per game, 26th in the NFL—which is why the addition of safety Lukas Denis is exciting.
Denis (5’11”, 190 lbs) isn’t going to be the biggest defensive back on the field, but he’s fast and smooth in pass coverage. He also possesses tremendous ball skills, as evidenced by his seven interceptions in 2017. He only had one pick last season, but he also had an impressive 31 solo tackles.
Given his skill set, the Boston College product should be able to provide depth at both cornerback and safety in Year 1, though the upside is there for him to eventually compete for a starting job.
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In an effort to improve the pass-catching weapons at Marcus Mariota’s disposal, the Tennessee Titans used a second-round draft pick on former Mississippi receiver A.J. Brown. Later, they landed North Carolina receiver Anthony Ratliff-Williams as a free agent.
Ratliff-Williams isn’t as polished a product as Brown, but he does have some intriguing upside. He is a 6’1″, 205-pound pass-catcher who amassed 42 receptions for 689 yards in 2018. He also has enough return ability to be a contributor as he continues learning what being an NFL receiver is all about.
“His kick-return ability and talent with the ball in his hands make him worthy of a late-round pick in hopes of sharpening his areas of weakness,” NFL.com’s Lance Zierlein wrote of Ratliff-Williams.
Ratliff-Williams may not immediately make the Titans’ passing attack an elite unit, but he does have the potential to make the team a little more fun to watch.
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Thomas Boyd/Associated Press
The Washington Redskins aren’t exactly thin at the tight end position, having both Jordan Reed and Vernon Davis. However, former Oregon tight end Kano Dillon is an intriguing prospect with the potential to add a little something extra to the offense.
Dillon has tremendous size for the position at 6’5″, 256 pounds, and he has adequate skills as both a blocker and a pass-catcher—though he doesn’t overwhelm in either area.
Where Dillon can excite is as a second tight end in running formations. Neither Reed nor Davis is a particularly dominant run-blocker. If Dillon can develop into one, he’ll help boost a ground game expected to feature plenty of Adrian Peterson, Derrius Guice and Chris Thompson in 2019.
Prime Minister Narendra Modi‘s ruling alliance led by right-wing Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) is likely to win a majority in parliament in the mammoth Indian general elections that ended on Sunday, most exit polls show.
The BJP-led National Democratic Alliance (NDA) is projected to win 287 seats in the 545-member lower house of parliament, called the Lok Sabha, followed by 128 for the Indian National Congress party-led opposition alliance, CVoter exit poll said on Sunday.
According to another poll released by Times Now television, Modi’s alliance is likely to get 306 seats, a clear majority. The network projected 142 seats for the United Progressive Alliance (UPA), led by the Indian National Congress.
Another TV channel, Sudarshan News, has given 313 seats to the NDA and 121 to the UPA. To rule, a party needs the support of 272 legislators. Votes are to be counted on Thursday.
One poll by Neta Newsx, though, forecast Modi’s alliance falling 30 seats short of majority.
Exit polls, which have a mixed record in a country with an electorate of 900 million people, were released minutes after India concluded its mammoth seven-phase national elections, which began on April 11.
As the final polling booths closed at 1230 GMT, a huge security cordon was thrown around the voting machines and boxes of paper votes used in the 542 seats for the world’s biggest election.
Modi’s constituency in Varanasi, the holy city in Uttar Pradesh state, was also among those to vote.
Acrimonious election
Critics say Modi has stoked fear among the country’s Hindu majority of the potential dangers posed by the country’s Muslims and Pakistan, and promoted a Hindu-first India.
But Modi’s supporters say the prime minister and his allies are simply restoring Hinduism to its rightful place at the core of Indian society.
The opposition, led by the Indian National Congress and its leader Rahul Gandhi, have accused him of pursuing divisive policies, neglecting the economy and leaving many farmers in ruin.
Gandhi, 48, tried several lines of attack against Modi, in particular over alleged corruption in a French defence deal and over the plight of farmers and on the economy.
Modi’s government fell short on creating jobs for the million Indians entering the labour market every month, the shock introduction of a currency ban in 2016, while Indian banks struggle with huge bad debts.
New Delhi-based Centre for Media Studies estimates that the outlay on this election could top $7bn, making it one of the priciest contests globally, with the lion’s share of the spending by the BJP, news agency AFP said.
Saturday Night Live is usually about the comedy and nothing else. But sometimes it has worthwhile things to say.
Leslie Jones joined the Weekend Update crew during the show’s Season 44 finale to share her thoughts on the multiple states that have moved to enact draconian anti-abortion laws. And guess what? It’s not a joke to her.
Jones spells out in stark terms exactly what this battery of state laws amounts to: an open war on women. And she has one response to that: a shouted “Dracarys,” the command word Danaerys Targaryen uses on Game of Thrones to make her dragons (sorry— dragon, singular) breathe fire.
Pete Davidson has carved out a comfortable niche on Saturday Night Live as a rap star with a love for weird tangents. Sketches from recent years really don’t get much better than Tucci Gang. Until now?
Davidson’s new one starts off in a familiar enough place: Game of Thrones, his “favoritest show ever.” But it’s really not. What Davidson’s heart of hearts really beats for is the odd couple Netflix series Grace and Frankie, starring Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda.
That’s it. That’s the joke. It’s great. The sketch also features surprise appearances from host Paul Rudd, musical guest DJ Khaled, and Kenan Thompson pal Jacob Anderson, who plays Grey Worm on Thrones.
Queen’s “Don’t Stop Me Now” is a fun song. Even when the lyrics are re-worked to celebrate the many transgressions and seemingly provable outright crimes of the Donald Trump administration.
Alec Baldwin brought his Trump schtick back to Saturday Night Live‘s cold open on May 18, the show’s Season 44 finale. The rousing Oval Office jam session featured all the familiar faces you’ve come to expect from SNL‘s many journeys into Trumpworld, including a special guest appearance from Robert De Niro as Robert Mueller.
Yes, Trump is still president and all the things that this fun song sings about are in fact completely terrible. But it sure is catchy, right?
According to Charania, the injury occurred in Game 2 on Thursday. Lillard has averaged 20.3 points and 7.3 assists in the series, though he’s shooting just 32.9 percent from the field.
Bleacher Report @BleacherReport
Despite Damian Lillard appearing to injure his ribs on this play in Game 2, Portland’s star has been playing through his injury.
In Game 3 on Saturday, Lillard hit just five of his 18 shots, scoring 19 points while registering six assists, six rebounds and two steals as the Golden State Warriors took a 3-0 series lead with a 110-99 win.
Injuries haven’t been much of a problem for the point guard in his career, as he’s never missed more than 10 games in a season. He played all 82 games in each of his first three years before averaging around 76 games over the past four years.
Although he was slowed by calf, hamstring and ankle injuries during the 2017-18 season, he still came through with 26.9 points and 6.6 assists per game. Not only did he earn his third All-Star selection last season, but he also finished fourth in MVP voting behind James Harden, LeBron James and Anthony Davis.
Lillard’s injury is an obvious concern for the Blazers, who are down 0-3 to the Kevin Durant-less Warriors. It appears Lillard will continue playing through the injury, with Game 4 set for Monday at 9 p.m. ET in Portland.
The mayor told POLITICO earlier this year that he would not rule out taking money from real estate executives in a potential presidential bid.
NEW YORK — Bill de Blasio is entering a crowded 2020 Democratic field full of candidates swearing off corporate donors unpopular with the left wing of the party. But the mayor of New York City sees no need to impose those types of restrictions on himself.
De Blasio has run aggressive and occasionally reckless fundraising operations since the start of his political career, when he wascensured for exceeding the legal spending limit in a City Council race. And now that he is vying for president and needs to show the country his fundraising prowess, he isgoing back to donors who want things from his administration — a practice he readily points out is not barred by law, even though it is the exact behavior that landed him in the crosshairs of federal prosecutors in 2016.
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De Blasio has cast himself as a leader of the progressive wing of his party with a focus on income inequality and getting big money out of politics. But his fundraising practices would appear at odds with that image. The mayor told POLITICO earlier this year that he would not rule out taking money from real estate executives in a potential presidential bid.
He boasted that under his watch, the city’s already stringent campaign finance system was made even more so last year — a reform he sought after being hammered for his record on campaign finance for years.
But as for ruling out specific types of donations, he replied, “That’s very individual. Everyone has to square it with their own values and their own sense of their mission.”
No city officials were charged in the U.S. Attorney’s Office probe of the mayor’s fundraising that closed in 2017, but prosecutors found several instances in which de Blasio and his fundraisers sought money from people with business before his administration and the mayor went as far as to direct city agencies to act on behalf of those donors.
A POLITICO review of thousands of emails released through a Freedom of Information request and interviews with former employees fill in the contours of de Blasio’s fundraising apparatus: Political staffers pushing him to hit up developers and unions seeking something from the city, while lawyers scramble to ascertain the guidelines for such fundraising and whether the mayor himself followed them.
Taken together, they demonstrate what has long become a pattern in de Blasio’s political career — playing fast and loose with established rules for raising and spending money.
“The mayor has repeatedly raised money through various C4 organizationsand now PACs [political action committees] from entities and individuals with business before the city, both raising questions of pay to play and undermining the city’s campaign finance limits,” said election reform advocate Susan Lerner, executive director of Common Cause New York. “It’s only barely legal and not outright illegal because the Supreme Court has systematically watered down anti-corruption laws.”
“That’s not the standard we’d hope to see the mayor of New York City hold himself to,” she added.
One week after taking office, de Blasio received a letter from the city’s Conflicts of Interest Board on the fundraising restrictions for Campaign for One New York — an outside nonprofit he established to promote his agenda. He and his aidesrelied on donations from individuals looking for action from the city on specific projects, and ultimately raised more than $4 million before shuttering it after the federal investigation began.
The ethics board’s advice was clear: The mayor could not personally solicit from anyone with “matters pending or about to be pending” before the city — advice the board codified in a formal rule last week. His staff was free to do so.
Despite the guidance, de Blasio did in fact call donors with city interests, the city’s Department of Investigation discovered during its own probe last year. It referred its determination, which was heavily redacted when made public, to the Conflicts of Interest Board. The boardwould not disclose whether it issued any penalties.
According to the 2018 Department of Investigation report, the mayor told city investigators he was “not specifically aware” of several fundraising restrictions regarding donors with business before the city.
Three people familiar with the fundraising protocols, who would only speak on background, said that assertion struck them as insincere, since they believe the mayor was briefed on the legal guidance. In fact, de Blasio constantly defends his practices when batting away reporters’ questions by insisting he followed legal protocol.
They said de Blasio would typically call donors to make his general pitch and his fundraiser at the time, Ross Offinger, would follow up with a specific monetary request.
But the vetting process to determine if the donors were within bounds did not become especially rigorous until April of 2014. At that point, City Hall officials and Hilltop Public Solutions, a consulting firm working on Campaign for One New York, began running the names through multiple databases and querying deputy mayors and top government staffers to ensure they did not pose conflicts, one of the sources said.
Multiple former aides and outside advisers told POLITICO they felt that both they and de Blasio had been poorly served by the mayor’s attorneys — whose at-times conflicting advice created confusion around the rules governing communications and fundraising for his outside nonprofits.
Several former aides, who spoke on condition of anonymity, remembered receiving conflicting opinions from different attorneys about how to communicate about de Blasio’s nonprofits. Some lawyers advised using only private email for communications. Others insisted all business be conducted on government email and maintained, incorrectly, that even City Hall staffers’ emails with people who didn’t work in government could be shielded from public disclosure.
The emails speak to that confusion as well.
One exchange from the spring of 2016 showed lawyers for the mayor and the Campaign for One New York furiously workshopping a response to a reporter’s question about whether the mayor personally raised money from donors with business before the city.
“Do you want to tell her the Mayor doesn’t do all the solicitations,” former City Hall counsel Henry Berger wrote in an email on May 2, 2016 to a group of government staffers, outside advisers, the mayor’s private attorney Barry Berke and well-known election lawyer Laurence Laufer, who was representing the Campaign for One New York.
“Then sh[e] will ask which ones he did and we don’t know the answer,” Berger wrote.
Those involved at the time said de Blasio received a warning letter from the Conflicts of Interest Board about his fundraising behavior, after City Hall attorneys flagged that the mayor personally solicited two donations from people who were off-limits, two people familiar with the matter told POLITICO. The New York Times haspublicly pressed de Blasio on the warning letter, but he has declined to answer any questions about it or make it public.
One of the donations was from developer and longtime ally Bruce Ratner, who had a matter pending when he gave, the sources said. The city returned that contribution and one other at the time.
Functional successor
In the middle of 2015, de Blasio launched his “Progressive Agenda,” a national policy platform he hoped to use to influence the 2016 presidential election. It was initially run by the Campaign for One New York, but in the summer of 2015, The Progressive Agenda Committee [TPAC] was spun off as a separate nonprofit, with its own executive director, staff and fundraising aims.
De Blasio did not seek any guidance from the city’s Conflicts of Interest Board about how to fundraise for the Progressive Agenda. Interviews with former staffers and emails show that his attorneys and staff considered it to be “functionally a successor” to the Campaign for One New York and generally believed it was governed by the same set of rules.
While multiple news outlets have reported that donors to the Campaign for One New York had business before the city, the emails show de Blasio’s aides suggesting he raise money for The Progressive Agenda from a different list of potential donors, many of whom also had business before the city.
Former City Hall staffers and aides to The Progressive Agenda could not recall whether or not de Blasio called the donors on the list, which was circulated in early March of 2016, just weeks before news would break of the federal probe into de Blasio’s fundraising.
The list included real estate developers like Steve Witkoff, Ron Moelis and David Kramer. Taxi drivers federation head and Manhattan restaurateur Fernando Mateo also was a target, as was Moishe Indig, a prominent leader in the Ultra-Orthodox Jewish community who had regular meetings with City Hall staffers for much of 2015 and 2016 to press for action on issues for his constituents.
A spokesperson for Moelis and Kramer said neither ever received a call soliciting funds from those working for The Progressive Agenda Committee. Mateo, Indig and Witkoff did not respond to requests for comment.
But the emails show that in the beginning, de Blasiodid play an extraordinarily hands-on role in identifying donors and soliciting funds for The Progressive Agenda.
The nonprofit reported raising money from just four discrete donors, all of whom de Blasio appears to have solicited himself — the United Food and Commercial Workers, American Federation of State County and Municipal Employees, a grocery chain called Mom’s Markets, and John Stocks, who gave money to the nonprofit through the Sixteen Thirty Fund, a shadowy organization of powerful Democratic donors whose donors aren’t publicly disclosed. Representatives for UFCW, Mom’s Markets and Stocks did not respond to requests for comment. A spokesperson for AFSCME declined to comment.
De Blasio’s de facto direction
Laufer also warned de Blasio’s advisers that the City Charter appears to say the mayor can’t raise money for a nonprofit organization in which he holds a position. And while de Blasio didn’t officially hold a title in either the Campaign for One New York or the Progressive Agenda, the emails show he was a de facto leader of both.
In a March 2016 email to de Blasio’s City Hall counsel, The Progressive Agenda’s executive director Geri Prado asked for advice about how to prepare federal tax documents for the organization that could shield the mayor and the nonprofit from legal problems.
“In light of the Mayor’s prime role in founding and convening the policy agenda but not playing a formal role on paper, I have several questions I’d like to discuss with both of you so we can ensure we are protecting the Mayor and his office as well as the c4 and potential c4 status of the organization,” Prado wrote.
A person with former ties to the mayor’s political operation, who would only speak on the condition of anonymity, questioned the donors de Blasio’s team has been taking money from for his federal Fairness PAC, the precursor to his 2020 campaign.
“If they are called out for the practice a couple of times, I think it’s weird that they continue to run up on that line by fundraising at all from people who may not be on the [city’s official] ‘doing business’ list but clearly do business with the city,” the person said.
“He may not be on the fucking database, which is probably a pretty bad database, but clearly he wants to do business with the city,” the person told POLITICO.
The mayor is no stranger to fundraising troubles.
In 2007 he received a $50,000 fine from the city Campaign Finance Board for exceeding the spending limit on his 2005 Council race — money that Laufer, who worked for him at the time, defended because it was part of an unsuccessful election to become speaker of the body. The Campaign Finance Board determined that those races were not separate enough to warrant exceeding the threshold.
De Blasio then continued raising money for years for that account to pay down that debt.
After becoming the city’s public advocate in 2009, he used an affiliated nonprofit to raise money for his support of national causes, all while attempting to elevate his own profile as he contemplated running for mayor.
That organization, the Fund For Public Advocacy, raised millions of dollars, including hundreds of thousands from billionaire George Soros. One of the Fund’s biggest projects, ironically, was opposing a Supreme Court ruling that enables unlimited donations in politics.
When he ran for mayor, he raised donations for that race while simultaneously asking the same individuals to give to his 2009 account so he could pay off debt from campaign poster fines.
Faced with perpetual scrutiny over his fundraising practices — not because a politician aggressively raising money is strange, but because de Blasio fancies himself the reformer’s reformer — the mayor espouses an ends-justify-the-means attitude.
“The mayor’s fundraising has helped countless four-year-olds enter free full-day pre-k and create the most affordable housing of any administration,” spokeswoman Freddi Goldstein said. “It was all driven by the goal of helping New Yorkers.”
The mayor actually boasted of his campaign finance reform credentials when addressing the Woodbury County Democratic Party in Sioux City, Iowa on Friday. He referenced a referendum that passed in November that lowered the maximum contribution limits for campaign donors, while increasing the public matching funds.
“You’ve got, for the first time ever, everyday people running for office and they don’t need any big donors in their life. Everything is low-dollar donations, everything is matching funds,” he said. “I would love to see that kind of system for our whole country.”
Major crude producers are set to meet on Sunday to discuss how to stabilise a volatile oil market amid rising US-Iran tensions in the Gulf, which threaten to disrupt supply.
Key OPEC members and other major suppliers including Russia will assess the oil market and examine compliance to production cuts agreed late last year.
But the subject of Iran, which is not present, will dominate the one-day meeting of the OPEC+ group, formed by OPEC members and its new petro allies – led by Russia.
The meeting comes days after sabotage attacks against tankers in highly sensitive Gulf waters and the bombing of a Saudi pipeline by Houthi rebels from Yemen.
The meeting also comes as the full impact of re-instated US sanctions against Tehran kicks in, slashing the Islamic republic’s crude exports.
Hours before the meeting in Jeddah, host Saudi Arabia said it does not seek war with Iran, but is ready to defend its interests.
The meeting is set to make recommendations ahead of a key OPEC summit in late June, to be attended by Iran.
President Donald Trump said last month Saudi Arabia and other OPEC members had agreed to his request to boost oil production in order to tamp down rising prices.
Massive drops in exports by Iran and Venezuela plus output cuts of 1.2 million barrels per day, implemented by the OPEC+ group since January, have cut supply.
But UAE Energy Minister Suheil al-Mazrouei said inventories were still building up.
He told reporters Saturday that the job of balancing the market was not yet complete, a hint that any ramp-up in production could send prices crashing as they did in late 2018.
Iran exports tumble
OPEC and the International Energy Agency said earlier this month that global oil supply fell in April due to US sanctions on Iran tightened and OPEC+ production cuts.
The IEA said Iranian crude production fell in April to 2.6 million bpd, down from 3.9 million before Washington announced in May 2018 it would withdraw from the 2015 Iran nuclear deal and re-impose sanctions.
Iran’s output is already at its lowest level in over five years, but could tumble in May to levels not seen since the devastating 1980-1988 Iran-Iraq war.
Energy intelligence firm Kpler sees Iranian exports plunging from 1.4 million bpd in April to around half a million barrels in May – down from 2.5 million in normal circumstances.
Venezuela’s output is also tumbling, down by over half since the third quarter of last year.
Kpler says data shows OPEC+ members have kept to agreed production cuts.
But exporters fear a rush to raise production to plug the gap left by Iranian exports could backfire, triggering a new supply glut.
Gulf tensions
Sunday’s meeting comes amid soaring Gulf tensions after the mysterious sabotage of several tankers off the Emirati coast and drone attacks, claimed by the Yemeni rebels, which shut a key Saudi crude pipeline.
Both attacks targeted routes built as alternatives to the Strait of Hormuz, the conduit for almost all Gulf exports.
Iran has repeatedly threatened to close the strait in case of war with the US, which said this month it was sending an aircraft carrier and strike group to the region.
Saudi Arabia accused Iran of ordering the pipeline attacks, targeting “the security of oil supplies… and the global economy”.
Saudi foreign affairs minister Adel al-Jubeir said Sunday his country does not want war with Iran, but was ready to defend its interests.
Riyadh “does not want a war, is not looking for it and will do everything to prevent it”, he told journalists in Riyadh.
Saudi Arabia called on Saturday for urgent meetings of the Gulf Cooperation Council and the Arab League to discuss escalating tensions, government news agency SPA said.
It also said Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman had spoken with US Secretary of State Mike Pompeo about enhancing security in the region.
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