I’m no math whiz, but I know a calculator when I see one.
Twitter users have started drawing a cute little calculator out of numbers and dashes, and there’s a small chunk of space for several words. It’s the perfect place to express your hot take, so of course it’s become a meme.
The tweets begin with “According to my calculations” and then feature the calculator, usually bearing some sort of juicy quip.
Let’s take a look and see how they all add up.
1. Is hating Disney a personality trait?
According to my calculations…
━━━━━ ━━
┃Adults who |
┃are obsessed ┃
| with Disney are|
| psychopaths |
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— Max Grossman (@GrossmanMax) April 8, 2019
SEE ALSO: Twitter’s new dark mode is actually black and it’s glorious
2. Not to quote Panic! At The Disco, but, “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?”
according to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ close the |
┃ door to my ┃
┃room when you
leave!!
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— 𝒶𝓁𝑜𝑒 𝓋𝑒𝓇𝒶 (@amichelle_15) April 6, 2019
3. Save the whales.
according to my calculations…
━━━━━ ━━
┃ seaworld is ┃
┃ still terrible ┃
┃ ┃
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— liv (@livxmay_) April 3, 2019
4. Twitter really is one big fun house — meant to be funny, but actually pretty scary at times.
according to my calculations
━━━━━ ━━
┃ i am |
┃ a fucking ┃
┃ clown ┃
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— eden
(@edexn) April 6, 2019
5. Rachel is over your issues.
according to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ thats not |
┃ my problem ┃└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— rachel hansen (@rachhhhhhansen) April 7, 2019
6. We’ll take your word for it.
according to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ bisexual |
┃ lesbians ┃
┃ dont
exist
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— k (@bisexualspies) April 7, 2019
7. Retweet.
According to my calculations…
━━━━━ ━━
┃
┃ I’m still. ┃
┃ Broke. ┃
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— Ishan Ali
(@ishanali101) April 8, 2019
8. RETWEET.
according to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ |
┃ i’m the shit. ┃
┃└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— nina
(@OratiloeMacheke) April 6, 2019
9. Probably could’ve figured this one out for myself, no calculating necessary.
According to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ |
┃ i’m gay ┃
┃ ┃└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— Arthur is on T! (@trainsgenderman) April 5, 2019
10. Of course, stan Twitter had to make their mark.
according to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ taylor swift |
┃didn’t deserve┃
┃any of the hate
she’s ever
gotten
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— izzy
(@13alltooswiftie) April 6, 2019
11. This one uses what appears to be actual math. Don’t quote me, though.
According to my calculations:
∆ = b² – 4 a c
-b± √∆
x1.8 = ————
2aTony Stark deserves to live.
— Alia Saw ︽✵︽ (@AliaLink101) April 6, 2019
12. A heartfelt calculation is the best calculation.
according to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃ I’m going |
┃ to miss my ┃
| college friends
| in the summer |
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— Andrew Hurst (@AFricknFilipino) April 6, 2019
13. And here’s one more. It’s about sports. Math and sports. A most unlikely pairing.
According to my calculations..
━━━━━ ━━
┃The Cowboys |
┃haven’t won a┃
┃Super Bowl in |
| 23 Years |
└━━━━━━ ┘
7 ┃ 8┃ 9┃ / ┃
━┛━┛━. |━ ┛
4 ┃5 ┃6 ┃ + ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛
1 ┃ 2 ┃ 3 ┃ = ┃
━┛━┛━┛━ ┛— Eagles Nation (@PHLEaglesNation) April 6, 2019
I’m glad this meme exists because when it comes to hot takes humor should always be part of the equation.
from Daily Trends Hunter http://bit.ly/2VwWbUF
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